Never did I realize the struggles in life until my only priorities changed.  No more did what bill to pay next become a priority, instead, I need to make sure my kids have a warm place to sleep, food to eat, and a spot to continue their education. Those became the weekly, sometimes daily, priorities in life. You see, being homeless will teach you about the real struggles in life and how life is so unpredictable. 

Years ago a situation happened that I thought hardened me forever. I felt that was the worst thing in the world and I’d never find Faith or Hope in humankind again. I honestly believed my heart was hardened, and I’d forever be distant from those once close to me, including my children. Anyone who knows me as a mother will know that was a hard feeling to have, but I felt it one-hundred percent.

Life is so unpredictable that one moment you’re fearing for your safety, and sanity while the next you’re feeling safe, and ready to regroup. Then, just as you think you have things figured out, life is unpredictable again. Leaving you without a home, without a place to feel rooted down, without any idea of what the next day or month will bring. It’s funny the struggles in life and how they can truly make or break you.

In time, during the hardships of being homeless, I still found a way to regrow my Faith and Hope in humankind again. I started hugging my children more, smiling and boy that first time I laughed again? Felt amazing!

Hello, my name is Brandy and it seems I live a life unpredictable! I’ve also started to have a new love addiction with eating cookies. Go figure. 

I suppose we could go back in time to a place when I was just a teenager. A time when I was quite unpredictable. A good student, yet someone who would run from her mother’s house frequently. I never could seem to avoid the struggles in life, and thus I live a life unpredictable still.

We all have things that happened to us during a stage when we didn’t have a choice. When truma happens at a young age, it starts to shape the core of your being. What you do with that, is how you’ll learn to grow stronger or weaker – the choice really is yours.

The biggest difference between back then and now is that I’m almost 38 years old. I’ve had quite a boatload of experiences, different counselors to help me overcome the old and new hardships, and I’m sort of ready for the struggles in life to pause. For something to give, a lending hand, a helpful soul, or something that truly allows me to realize that these struggles in life recently were worth something. 

Let’s face it, I’m not alone with the struggles in life.

We are all going through our own struggles, perhaps you’re not homeless but you’re single and kind of getting sick of that loneliness.

Perhaps you’re co-parenting for the first time and miss your kids dearly.

Maybe the local grocery store ran out of your favorite ice cream! 

It doesn’t really matter what your struggle is …

we all have struggles in life.

That doesn’t make my struggles in life more weight-bearing than yours or your struggles more than mine. It just means we are all struggling in some way, and those of us who remain focused on being positive just don’t show those struggles as much to the outside world. 

Of Course, It’s Hard! Life is Unpredictable! 

Listen, I know it’s hard. I know you’re looking for solutions, help, and advice. Just be sure you’re asking people who’ve been through a similar experience. Anyone who hasn’t been in a similar experience; homeless, abused, co-parenting, parenting, etc. etc. will lend you advice based on nothing. If they have never lived it, it’s going to be difficult for them to lend decent advice. 

Think about the time before you were a parent. You thought you knew it all, and then those kids happened and boy! Did you ever change your ways? No? Well then you’re one of the few, I tell you I changed after the 2nd and then 3rd child. More open-minded, carefree and honestly not as much of a stickler like I was when the firstborn was a little. 

The point is, we can learn from others who have had similar experiences but when struggles in life hit and someone who has mommy and daddy or someone else saving them at every corner wants to lend you tips? They aren’t going to help! It will only make you more angry and bitter about your current scenario. 

The key to rising up from the struggles in life is to remain strong and only seek advice from someone who’s been in a similar boat before. Those who truly have had an unpredictable life and went at it in a similar way as you. I’ve found, based on my experiences, that those who’ve experienced homelessness with kids, who’s had such hardships without someone paying their way for a solution, only those people who’ve lived it always lend the best advice. 

I personally hate pity, it does not make me feel better at all! I’d rather have someone lend a helpful word or hand when the struggles in life happen. 

The thing is, I haven’t whined about these struggles in life or shared them much because I swear the last four years of my life have become so unpredictable that I can’t even make heads or tales of it. I am rather embarrassed, to be honest, but the reality is I’m not alone. I’ve spoken to so many people that have experienced similar situations and struggles in life! Instead of sitting here crying or wallowing in self-pity, wondering what will be next, I choose to be stronger.

I choose to make a conscious effort to make the best of the every day blessings.

To avoid thinking too far into the future, and to work my hardest to pause for fun, homeschooling, and life with the ones I hold dearest. A home will come when the finances and time is right, but my kids and family? They keep growing older. They won’t pause their growth to old age just because I’m having some struggles in life, and I don’t want one moment to go by regretting that I didn’t get one last hug or I love you, especially from my children. 

That’s just me though. I hope that somehow these thoughts shared today will help someone out there living a life unpredictable, feeling as if all is lost and nothing is going right.

I hope that perhaps today you can find some sunshine during your darkest of days, and hold on tight. For this too shall pass …


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