She created so many habits that had helped her with growth and discovery in this season of life, but then one day she let that all go. She started drinking again. She stopped going barefoot on the grass. She let the world troubles soak into her soul and carry away a piece of her joy and peace within.
She started to conform to the outside world, and in that, she lost another piece of herself. She sat there craving alcohol. This craving was so strong that she realized she had backstepped in so many ways. When did this happen? How did she let this happen? Who can help her climb back up?
God.
Friends.
Family.
The people who know her best are the ones who can give her a hand and a hug to remind her once again that she didn’t “fall off a bandwagon” in vain, that she is stronger than her cravings, and that she has climbed out of this pit before; she will do it again.
Only now, she has more resilience and more Faith than she had all those years ago when she woke up to realize that she had been pulled into this deep hole of sadness and despair. She is no longer that woman. She is stronger. She is smarter. She is more loving and kind to herself than she was all those years ago.
Or is she?
Perhaps this is something she simply cannot have the strength to climb out. Maybe she is destined to make the same choices, yet in a different scenario. What can she do to stop feeling this way? What is it that causes her to devalue her worth and start to think she is nothing of value to others and should just live in solitude?
What is going on here, really going on here?
She isn’t quite sure. She just knows how she feels and that the emotions are fleeting. She feels stable ground when there are people around her, loving her, showing her they can be trusted, healing her wounds that were created so many years ago.
The alcohol may pause the pain, but the alcohol also creates a monster. She is starting to feel as though she is becoming what she didn’t want to become: a person who feels sorry for herself and doesn’t see a value in her intelligence or personality. This could be a dangerous path to walk for some people.
The key here is – awareness!
Awareness is her superpower – and she enjoys dabbling in the dark and light to figure out where her true balance in this world lies.
The first step to making any forward progression is to recognize the feeling, write out the thoughts, sleep on it, and then make a list of what it is that she desires most in this lifetime. Weigh the pros and cons of the life she is in right now, make a list!
Find out what is truly important, and figure out why she started sipping that alcohol to hide away from the pain, again? What is this pain that she didn’t know she carried until she started consuming alcohol again?
The pain is there to show her something, and she must see it in order to move forward again and overcome a new season of challenges with her younger inner child. What will she decide to do this time? She already made one choice, and she knows that choice is the best choice, but what is her best NEXT choice to make so that she can continue being a light in this world for those who need to soak in the warmth that comes from her gentle, loving nature?